Handwritten page of a diary dated August 1, 1977

grandma tells me I can be anything I want to be. I think, then she should get her boyfriend to clean out the backyard because before he moved in it used to be peaceful back there and it’s where I used to go to paint pictures. People said my imagination was golden.

I’m OK with the idea that I have to grow up in what grandma calls the lowest of the lower middle class. I read that if you get what you want all the time, you go soft. I don’t think I could keep being such an edgy artist if I had a butler to bring me a glass of champagne while I worked. But I do need a little space to get my mind freed up.

If you want to see a choice low low middle class backyard, I found a book in the library with a picture from Paris. It’s junky, but it’s not a bummer like mine. If I coulda been born 60 years ago in Paris, I wouldn’t go to school where spazzes walk around saying May The Force Be With You. I would hang around with tantalizing naked people who would want to pose for me even though I couldn’t afford to pay them very much.


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Published in: on March 8, 2010 at 4:30 am  Leave a Comment