Handwritten page of a diary dated February 23, 1994
… Uncle Adam said they paid $18 for a small GOURMET pizza that coulda been made by a helper monkey.
I wanted him to explain what a helper monkey was, but I think he wasn’t sure, because he talked a lot but never really answered the question. So I looked it up and it said monkeys can help people and bring them stuff and turn the lights off and even wash their face — and they can turn the pages for people with no hands who want to read a book. Even though I have hands, I thought it would be fun to have a little slave. I thought about it a lot.
But then I found some pictures of monkeys, and they look too much like real people. I don’t think I could boss them around just so I could be lazy.
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