Red cowgirl hat

cowgirl dress

Handwritten page of a diary dated March 3, 1986

… pulled out this dress and I barely remembered it at first, so she showed me a picture of myself wearing it. It was really red, I said. It was, she said, and then started telling me that she once saw the ruby slippers from the Wizard of Oz and they’re not as bright red as they used to be either. I’m so sure you saw the real ruby slippers from the Wizard of Oz, I said, and she said she sure did because her Aunt Virginia took her to the Smithsonian once and they have all that kind of stuff you’d ever want to see.

You got to go to all the cool places, I said.

You went on a good long vacation once, she said, but I think she’s probably referring to the vacation when I stayed at a motel with a swimming pool  of which excuse me but I don’t even remember at all so what good is that?

I asked her what happened to the red hat that went with this outfit, but she said I left it in the motel room and when she talked to them on the phone later they wanted five dollars to mail it to us but that was twice as much as the hat cost in the first place.


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Published in: on January 25, 2013 at 10:23 pm  Comments (1)  

Red cowgirl boots

red cowboy boots

Handwritten page of a diary dated June 12, 2006

…  because you can hardly believe two sisters came from the same parents because they are not alike in any possible way you could imagine. like even when my mom has a day off from work she still looks like she belongs playing golf at the country club — but my aunt wears red cowboy boots almost every day (oh sorry. she says they’re cowGIRL boots)

i was at the mall Saturday with mom and aunt may and we were eating tacos at the food court when JUSTIN walked in with his new girlfriend (yes I do know her name but I might throw up if I type it)

aunt may knew about my bad breakup but she had never seen justin so my mom made the mistake of pointing him out. then aunt may says she’s going to go “rag him out” and I said Please Don’t You’ll Make It Unbelievably Embarrassing. so she says He’s The One Who Should Be Embarrassed and then she gets this plan in which she is going to go over there and start dancing around and singing “dont cha wish your girlfriend was hot like me.” ive seen her dance before when there’s nobody around but us and it’s bad enough believe me but if she sang that i would’ve DIED EVEN MORE. so i gave mom a horrified look and right away mom told aunt may that if she started to walk over by justin she’d tackle her to the ground.

wow. mom. thanks. once in a while you rock.


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Published in: on January 16, 2013 at 2:52 pm  Leave a Comment  

VW bus

Volkswagen van

Handwritten page of a diary dated June 15, 1966

…  since Grandpa’s house smells like old people ever since Great Grandma moved in with him. But then I asked him if I could park my van behind his garage for the summer (because it is his very own daughter who is driving me out of our house by saying that if she hears my radio playing the Beaker Street show on that Little Rock station ONE MORE NIGHT she will make me move in the basement with Uncle Dwayne) (the chainsmoker) (and she will turn my bedroom into a sewing room).

So Grandpa not only said yes I could live back there beside his old truck, but he got some old circus tent out of his garage and draped it around a porta-potty. He calls it my “privy.” I thanked him about a hundred billion times and he said some day when I’m “rollin’ in clover” I can pay him back by giving him a little cottage on the grounds of my estate. So I said “Deal.”


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Published in: on January 6, 2013 at 2:27 pm  Comments (2)  

Nap police

nap police

Handwritten page of a diary dated February 6, 2005

…  I mean come on, we’re on vacation. I wish somebody would tell me why she thinks everyone needs to take a nap every afternoon or they will die.

She found out some of us were at the rec center and she came screaming over there driving the golf cart and asked if any of us had taken a nap. She kept saying stuff like “sure, you guys haven’t seen each other for six months, it’s all fun and games until you get tired and start beating the hell out of each other.” Yeah we do get into fights sometimes. I gotta admit it. But some little nap isn’t going to cure that.


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Published in: on January 2, 2013 at 9:17 am  Comments (1)